Sunday, December 18, 2011

Never in a million years

I know overly-dramatic much? You guys believe when I say that I never... never thought something like this would happen. If you haven't realized by now from my about me or whatever I'm 25 okay. I've never actually had something I would call a date. I think it's the shyness I have, or  that could just be an excuse. I feel kind of like Drew Barrymore in Never been kissed. Actually, I feel a lot like her. In more ways then I can count. I've joked with a few friends of mine how I'm gonna be the one who is 80 something years old with 100 cats, and that's about it. Then I look back over the past few weeks, and maybe, just maybe I'll grow to be someone else. Sure, I'll still be that old lady, but perhaps I'll have the life that most every little girl dreams about you know the one I'm talking about right? The family, the house, the husband. I'm not saying that it will happen now, but just this little bit gives me hope that maybe I'm not doomed to a life I thought I was, that life where I'm alone forever. It's kind of heartbreaking for me to even type something like that, but that is truly how I've felt all my life. That I would be alone forever. That I wouldn't find that one person who makes me feel like I'm worth something, the one person who could complete me. Sorry, I read way to many YA books.

I will say this though for the time being I'm completely happy with the way things are going. It's nice to feel wanted, loved, worth any amount of time.

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